


Call the Fire Department, I'm Cooking!

by The C in MJCK (Writersblock159)



Category: RWBY
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Bad Cooking, Cooking, Everyone Hide, Fire, Gen, Humor, Yang isn't very good
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-24
Updated: 2019-08-24
Packaged: 2020-09-25 23:56:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20380246
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Writersblock159/pseuds/The%20C%20in%20MJCK
Summary: Blake looked down at her scroll as it beeped at her."Yang's in the kitchen. Alone."Shoving everything into her bag, the faunus bolted for the door. She only hoped the building would still be standing when she got to the dorm.





	Call the Fire Department, I'm Cooking!

**Author's Note:**

> Once is chance, twice is a pattern. I may be writing this fandom for a bit.  
Fair warning: I got this about 95% beta'd before my beta fell off the face of the earth. Please consider this when reading and feel free to let me know when you find a mistake.  
Enjoy.

_ "Ready or not, here I come..." _

_ Ready or Not - Bridgit Mendler _

♥ ♣ ♦ ♠

Weiss entered to total chaos. 

A shower of clothes, shoes, and assorted equipment flew out of the closet that the four of them shared. A moment later, Ruby emerged as well.

"Where is it? Where is it!? Aha!" Her partner was clutching a bucket of sand, a fire extinguisher and a super soaker water gun under her arms, and wearing what she swore was a flame retardant test pilot flight suit. 

Weiss was also fairly sure the only thing that Ruby outright owned in that ensemble was the bucket. 

"Weiss! Excellent, you're here. Take this!" She shoved the fire extinguisher into her hands, before suddenly  _ pulling _ it back again. "Wait, no. Change first. Protection then weapon." Weiss opened her mouth to tell her partner that there was  _ no way _ she was getting into something that shiny when the loud clatter of footsteps sounded behind her. 

"Tell me I'm not too late." Blake gasped, clearly out of breath from her run. At Ruby's head shake, the faunus raced into the room, slamming the door and pulling off her shirt while nimbly stepping between the assorted piles of clothes. "I just got your message." Sliding her pants off, the faunus grabbed the flight suit that Ruby indicated and began pulling it on. 

Weiss closed her mouth. Blake was supposed to be the level headed one in the group. If her response was to promptly change, then Weiss should probably do the same. 

"Um, Ruby?" She asked a few moments later, now halfway through changing. Her partner glanced at her. "What, exactly, is the reason for this?" She motioned to the suit as she zipped it up. 

Ruby looked surprised, then serious. "Yang's cooking." 

A shiver of fear jolted down Weiss' spine, and she snatched the fire extinguisher from under the shorter girl’’s arm. "Why didn't you tell me?" she half -shrieked, yanking the door open and running into someone. 

Ruby helped her up, apologizing to the person on the other side of the door. "Sorry, Nora." to Weiss she continued, "and I did tell you, I messaged you like two minutes before you walked in." 

Blake motioned to her watch. "Guys, Yang is alone, with  _ fire _ ." She emphasized the last word like a parent to toddler, but it got the other two moving. 

Racing by Nora with another "Sorry!" from Ruby, the three ran downstairs to the dorm’s shared kitchen. 

Upon arrival it was clear they weren't too late…yet. Yang was staring forcefully at a bowl of unpopped popcorn, a scowl adorning her face.

Ruby entered first, her bucket ready in case something greasy had already caught on fire, with Blake entering right behind, Super Soaker already primed and trained on Yang. Wiess took up the rear, eyes scanning for any burning walls or cabinets. 

So far, so good. The three girls relaxed a bit. 

Yang seemed to come to a decision. Grabbing the bowl, she slammed it on the stove and turned the gas up to 'High' before reaching for the wet bar they kept for the older students. 

"Yang!" Ruby yelled, causing her sister to jump and turn around, a bottle of…something in her hand. 

"Ruby." Yang looked like a kid with their hand in the cookie jar. She scuffed her foot on the floor of the kitchen, head down, hands now behind her back, unaware of the terrified looks her teammates were now sharing. 

Blake primed her gun again… 

And the kitchen exploded. 

♥ ♣ ♦ ♠

“I’m sorry,” Yang apologized again as she took another handful of popcorn from the bowl. “I didn’t mean to start the kitchen on fire. I didn’t want to hurt your feelings. I know I’m not supposed to cook without you guys there because it’s our tradition, but I wanted to surprise you.”

Ruby gave her sister a hug. “I can honestly say that the entire dorm was surprised. As was the fire brigade.”

Blake finished setting up the movie and sat down next to the blonde. “Honestly Yang, if you had just asked one of us to help we could have told you that there was bagged popcorn in the fridge.”

“I know,” the blonde hung her head guiltily, “but I know that you guys like it when it’s fresh.”

A moment later Wiess slipped in the room, bringing in the faint smell of smoke with her. “Yang, Ozpin has a few questions for you.”

“Of course,” the blonde muttered tiredly. Ruby paused the movie, which was just starting, as her sister left to speak to the headmaster.

Silence filled the room for a moment before Weiss thumped down next to the popcorn bowl. “So… that could have gone better.” With that declaration the white haired girl grabbed a handful of kernels and began eating them one at a time.

Blake shrugged. “The last time she tried making something, we were downstairs pulling flaming noodles off of the ceiling. This time we got to her  _ as _ she started the fire, not after.”

Nodding, Ruby agreed, “None of  _ us _ were on fire either, like the time she tried making waffles, so definite improvement on that front as well.”

“I suppose it’s better than the boiled leek explosion,” Weiss concurred, thoughtfully chewing on her popcorn. “Although they won’t let her mix drinks anymore after she accidentally started the old wet bar on fire.”

Blake absently grabbed a handful of popcorn as well. “And it was definitely better than the deviled egg fiasco.”

Ruby shuddered. “When those went off they called the police. I’d say  _ anything  _ is better than that.” Wiess snorted.

“Except maybe the walnut attack.”

“Ohhh, yeah good point. Those shells  _ hurt _ .” Blake finished her handful and stared at the bowl.

“I just about died when the bomb squad came for that one,” Ruby muttered, getting up from the floor. “There’s still popcorn in the fridge right?” 

“Yeah,” Blake confirmed. “But I grabbed a bag, it should be on my bed.”

As Ruby refilled the bowl, Yang came back. ”So apparently Ozpin wants us to take _another_ cooking class next week, I can’t wait!”

♥ ♣ ♦ ♠

**Author's Note:**

> Working title is the same. Inspired by "Clear the Sidewalks, I'm Driving."  
R&R


End file.
